Bro. You're in denial mode now. How you know it's not your wife who made the first move? Both are at fault. 50/50. It takes two hands to clap...

You must learn to take a step back and look at the bigger picture. And please don't go beat up that guy. You how old already? It's not as if you're young with no commitments. You want to give your wife legitimate reasons to win the divorce and you lose the custody of your kids?

Re: Wife caught heavy petting with man
 

You are making the assumption that your wife is somehow the "victim" of his advances but I doubt very much if this is the case.

Women know how to send out the right signals when they want to bond with a member of the opposite sex.

When a woman signals that she is available there are very few men in this world who would say "Sorry I'd love to have sex with you but because you are married I decline.". :p

Take the fact that the guy is attracted to your wife as a compliment because I have many friends whose wives I would not fuck even if they offered me money to do the deed. They are that ugly. :D

Re: Wife caught heavy petting with man
 

Bro parrotkid, why do you keep blaming the man? Your wife is not a child, she is an adult, fully capable of making her own decision. The man gave her a chance?

Yes, we all, in a moments of folly make mistakes but you mentioned it is not the first time.

This simply tells you how much commitment your wife is willing to put into her marriage and how much you means to her.

The man is at fault, your wife is at fault, what about you bro? Where is your fault? You keep forgiving her then you keep ranting here? What is the point?

Walk away (from this toxic marriage), get closure and make peace with yourself and lead a better life.

You are a man, act like one, your kids will thank you as they grow up.

Re: Wife caught heavy petting with man
 

Yes. I must agree on this. If she doesn’t also send out signals he wouldn’t dare to proceed.

Re: Wife caught heavy petting with man
 

Have to agree with most bros here. Most guys and girls have temptations and needs, if not fulfilled they will just eat outside and find nicer food to taste. If you can't forgive her, just let her go. Win win situation. Unless you really want her to stay then just close one or two eyes and move on with your life. You can also find someone else if you have any revenge thoughts.

Re: Wife caught heavy petting with man
 

First TS say his fault also cos he bz with work. Then now say the mans fault...

Which man say no to a free fuck pussy?? If this old n ugly guy dun hit on ur wife, another younger more handsome might. So younger more handsome guy at fault??

Ur wife itchy la bro. If her cb not itchy, wun have all this problems. N nt first time shows u how much she respect this marriage you have.

For a less stressful future, sooner u wake up n sooner u fuck her off is better for ur life.

Re: Wife caught heavy petting with man
 

rather than blame the wife or the man. Its probably good to reflect if your sex life with wife is good enough. If shes getting her fix of orgasms regularly, i doubt most will want to risk the marriage for cheap thrills.

Life in SG arent JAV plots man. So, go for some counselling if you cant get her to talk.

Re: Wife caught heavy petting with man
 

My 2 cents for what it is worth

I would like to break this down into the following:

Victims: The only victim/s in this story are your children, you might not want to believe this now but it is true. They will be the ones that suffer the most at the end of the day.

Husband AKA parrotkid

Wife lets call her Cheryl

The cheater man lets call him Andy


I would like to sympathizes with you on your discovery I can only image the feeling, dissatisfaction and heart wrenching emotions.
There are many reasons for infidelity such as revenge, boredom, the thrill of sexual novelty, sexual addiction however a large majority of the time, motivations differ by gender, with men searching for more sex or attention and women looking to fill an emotional void.
Remember women are also less likely than men to have an affair that "just happens," because they tend to think longer and harder about the situation.

Some women take time "to warm up to it. Going in and leaving quickly isn't their thing. Men can walk away more easily because their emotions are just different and it is unusual for a woman to want to have sex and forget about it.


Taking the above into account I would say that it is not fair to blame Andy, yes it is in our nature to want to blame other parties. Placing blame should be the last thing one does in a situation like this.

So take a step back ask your self what did I do to be the cause of this once you have answer this move on to the next step which is to have a adult discussion with Cheryl. This discuss should not be a mud sling match more or a finding out what and why things happened. Both parties need to be brutally honest during this discussion laying out all the facts on the table. You will be amazed at what can transcend from these discussions. Things that piss Cheryl off about you that was never known and vice versa.
Also never use the kids as a weapon remember they are the victims here.

After the discussion you need to decide what the next step will be. Now don't kid yourself in saying you will be able to forgive and forget. That only happens in novels and movies. People never forgive or forget. Heart ache is also only temporary however the hit to your ego is not. You will always live with the fact that your wife has cheated on you and that feeling of the unknown if she is doing that again is extremely difficult to manage. This might further cause trouble in a already troubled marriage.

So in conclusion it sounds if you really do love your wife and care for your family which is a good start maybe both you and Cheryl can talk this situation out and find out what is lacking in your relationship and to why the things happened what did.

Re: Wife caught heavy petting with man
 

Above analysis was nicely shared on the thoughts and analysis by a bro/sis.

I read the whole episode from TS...

RCA/Root Cause Analysis:
Did a search and realised TS had been asking for alot advices and opinions from Affairs of the heart section more than 5 years ago back to 2012...
I personally feel that TS issues throughout the years was not solved and become sooner leads to work and health depression.
Becareful as alot cases we had seen ended up bloody mess...
Think of the kids, the woman whom don't spare a thought of her 2 kids, how to continue on as a mother, given a choice of kids and extra affairs?

My 1 cents worth of opinion/problem solving:
Do talk nicely for 1 time finale and see what she wants and she propose.
Do not beg unless the truth is TS was that went out of boundary first and wife found out and is doing on revenge.
We do not know true story or better picture as 3rd party (TS yourself will know).

Please consult some professional family counselling from official sources that can help to better advise before it's too late (Not sure if it's still too late as issues dragged for years...)

Treat opinions here from fellow sbf bros as a guideline but we are not the professionally trained so do get some professional help.
Google Search: family counselling Singapore

God Bless and may you solve the problem or find the root cause! :)

Re: Wife caught heavy petting with man
 

Ts tends towards a procrastinating nature. Already advised him years back to make sure the wife is occupied but alas I guess our advice is not good enough for his ears. Whats the point of commenting further?

Re: Wife caught heavy petting with man
 

Means he cant let wife go so continue to wear green hat lo.

Re: Wife caught heavy petting with man
 

Is the man a relative or just an acquaintance? Have you confronted her with what you seen? Her response will determine if you leave or stay.

Suggest you seek some psychological help just in case.

Re: Wife caught heavy petting with man
 

Bro, have you sat down and calmly discuss the situation with your wife and try and see if there is a way to work things out?

Talk to her!

Re: Wife caught heavy petting with man
 

Wife refused to be occupied. She has kids to tend to but dump the responsiblity onto me.

Re: Wife caught heavy petting with man
 

whats the point of staying on?