Jokes for Relaxing.. [new thread]

[Hotdickson6699]

Great share bro. Its good

[bigbirdbird]

Love Dress

A woman stopped by unannounced at her recently married son's house. She rang the doorbell and walked in.

She was shocked to see her daughter-in-law lying on the couch, totally naked. Soft music was playing; and the aroma of perfume filled the room.

"What are you doing?" she asked. "I'm waiting for my husband to come home from work," the daughter-in-law answered.

"But you're naked!" the mother-in-law exclaimed.

"This is my love dress," the daughter-in-law explained.

"Love dress? But you're naked!"

"My husband loves me to wear this dress," she explained. "It excites him to no end. Every time he sees me in this dress, he instantly becomes romantic and ravages me for hours on end. He can't get enough of me."

The mother-in-law left.

When she got home, she undressed, showered, put on her best perfume, dimmed the lights, put on a romantic CD, and laid on the couch waiting for her husband to arrive.

Finally, her husband came home. He walked in and saw her laying there so provocatively.

"What are you doing?" he asked.

"This is my love dress," she whispered, sensually.

"Needs ironing," he said.

[bigbirdbird]

Top 10 things a man would do if he woke up in the morning with a Vagina:

10. Immediately go shopping for zucchini and cucumbers.

9. Squat over a hand mirror for an hour and a half.

8. See if they could finally do a split.

7. Cross their legs without rearranging their crotch.

6. Get picked up in a bar in less that 10 minutes

5. Have consecutive multiple orgasms and still be ready for more
without sleeping first.

4. Go to the gyno and ask to have the examination recorded on video.

3. Sit on the edge of the bed and pray for breasts, too.

2. Actually catch a buzz off 1 wine cooler.

And the # 1 thing a man would do is:

1. Finally find that damn G-spot.

[dyelook]

laughter bumps...

[horizonferry]

Originally Posted by bigbirdbird

Top 10 things a man would do if he woke up in the morning with a Vagina:

10. Immediately go shopping for zucchini and cucumbers.

9. Squat over a hand mirror for an hour and a half.

8. See if they could finally do a split.

7. Cross their legs without rearranging their crotch.

6. Get picked up in a bar in less that 10 minutes

5. Have consecutive multiple orgasms and still be ready for more
without sleeping first.

4. Go to the gyno and ask to have the examination recorded on video.

3. Sit on the edge of the bed and pray for breasts, too.

2. Actually catch a buzz off 1 wine cooler.

And the # 1 thing a man would do is:

1. Finally find that damn G-spot.

Thank you bro for nice joke.

[Republicunt]

Originally Posted by bigbirdbird

Love Dress

A woman stopped by unannounced at her recently married son's house. She rang the doorbell and walked in.

Very nice share, thanks bro

[Troi33]

Originally Posted by Hurricane88

Thanks bro for sharing

[Hurricane88]

Friday jokes...

[Hurricane88]

Friday more jokes...

[harbourbay]

Good morning! Thanks for sharing nice jokes.

[Hurricane88]

*ELDERS JOKE*.
*****************
*Grandma & grandpa were watching healing service on TV. Pastor told all who wanted to be healed to put one hand on the TV and the other hand on the body part that wanted healing*.
*Grandma slowly put one hand on the TV and the other on her arthritic shoulder. Grandpa too got up, put one hand on the TV and the other on his private part. Grandma looked @ him and says... "Dear I guess you just don't get it, do you? The purpose is to heal the sick, NOT to raise the dead"!!* Lol 😀😀😀

Pictorial joke...

[Pasarbella]

Originally Posted by Hurricane88

Wahahaha so evil

[shiyihai]

Originally Posted by Hurricane88

Hahaha why think so much? LOL

[8April]

Originally Posted by Hurricane88

*ELDERS JOKE*.
*****************
*Grandma & grandpa were watching healing service on TV. Pastor told all who wanted to be healed to put one hand on the TV and the other hand on the body part that wanted healing*.
*Grandma slowly put one hand on the TV and the other on her arthritic shoulder. Grandpa too got up, put one hand on the TV and the other on his private part. Grandma looked @ him and says... "Dear I guess you just don't get it, do you? The purpose is to heal the sick, NOT to raise the dead"!!* Lol 😀😀😀

Very nice share, thanks bro!!

[LuckyBird]

Nice jokes